Saturday, January 16, 2010

The Job of Daughters.....

Whoever knew that the job of a daughter would be so extensive? Beyond the “let’s make dad crazy by dating this guy” or “what can I do to annoy my parents” or “how far can I drive the car and just leave a little bit of gas” kind of mentality, there’s so much more expected.

Daughters are caught in a tough position. Wanting to be independent yet trying to hold onto the family ties as long as possible. Wanting to pull away yet sucked in at the same time.

When I was a teenage/college kid, I would meet my dad at the door to tell him mom had a new haircut, so comment on it. You’d think he’d notice on his own. But, nope. He’s a guy. They notice nothing. Other tidbits would be offered as the proper situations arose. Dads owe their daughters so much……

Birthdays are no different. My recent one came and went with little notice. One half hearted, “let’s tell mommy happy birthday.” That was it.


No cake, no card, no flowers, no nothing. We don’t do gifts so that was fine. But, a little fanfare would be nice. Even just a smidgeon.

After a sad day, I emailed the eldest kid away at school and vented a bit. She vowed to come home this weekend and do a birthday celebration again…..but I hate to ask that of her.

She evidently also called her daddy and told him mom was bummed out. Not sure what else happened during that call.

All I know is, he arrived home from church tonight with a dozen roses in his hand.

Another case of daughter looking out for mom.

All I know is, I love my big girl and miss her when she’s gone. Yes, she drives me crazy and yes, she is partly the reason why my hair is gray.

But I can’t imagine life without her.


Faith, Hope, and Love said...

Yes, our older girls take care of us moms. Thank God someone does.
Moms give SO much of themselves...constantly...and when there is nothing left to give...they somehow muster up more to give.
I'm glad you got some roses. Good job dad! :)
Speaking of roses...they don't come anymore. It seems that since I complained years ago about the hight cost and the poor quality of my last bouquet...he decided I didn't like getting flowers. Nice.
I hope a wonderful birthday celebration is coming! Happy Birthday! :)


NeuroMama said...

Oh, happy belated birthday, Kristin! I'm so glad that your daughter came through for you in the end. It is amazing what a special bond a mother and an oldest daughter can have. I have always felt that with my own mother and now I feel it with my oldest daughter.

I hope you're having a great weekend! You deserve every bit of fanfare they can muster up (I hope it's a lot).


The Johnson 5 said...

(wiping away tears) My girl is the same way. Her being the youngest and the only female child, she looks out for EVERYONE! Reminds the boys of what they need to remember, helps dad gets his words together. And all the while, she has a smile on her face.
I love the relationship that the 2 of you have. Tell your girl, the KSU mom blogger said GOOD JOB!!

Tara said...

First of all... HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

So I have that to look forward to as Kennedi gets older!

Boys really are no good at that stuff. Chris wanted to take the boys out Christmas shopping and Conner had no interest. I guess Avery is a mommy's boy still because he did jump at the chance but I am sure those days are ending now that he is a teen!

Carrie said...

I totally get that and my oldest is almost 10. Sorry you had a crappy BDAY-Hugs!

Laura L. said...

Oh I'm so glad you have Katie in your life. What a blessing she is.
I know you miss her when she's away. I understand that fully. (sniff, sniff)
These adult daughters are wonderful and I realize it more all the time.

I'm sorry about your birthday. I hope that every time you smell those roses, it will get a bit better.

NeuroMama said...

Hmmm...I was hoping to check in tonight and see a post about a wonderful birthday celebration this weekend. Hopefully, you're just too exhausted from partying it up to tell us about it!


JShannon said...

I have a 15 yr old (foster) daughter who is the same way. She really looks out for me and makes sure DH does everything right. I think girls are naturally protective of their mothers. I know I did the same thing for my mother, still do in fact.