Friday, April 23, 2010

The Cookie Thief

Each day is always unusual so why did I expect today to be any different?

We were almost at school when Alex realized he forgot the cookies he needed for his Chemistry assignment.

Sigh.

Being the sucker that I am, I said I would return home during the morning to pick them up. (note: I don’t typically do this but he needs all the points he can get in this class)

I arrived home around 9:15. Opened the door…..and the alarm did not go off.

Huh. I know I set it before leaving.

Took a quick glance at the island and realized the cookies were gone.

Another huh.

But the tv and computer were still there.

Who would come in the house and only steal cookies?

All kinds of possibilities went through my mind…..maybe a friend came by, or Katie.

No, all the friends are in school.

Called Katie….and woke her up. Wasn’t her.

Hmm, maybe the cookie thief is still in my house.

Set the alarm and left. But hung out in the driveway waiting to catch the thief trying to escape.

I then realized how dumb that was…..and went back in to search the house.

Which was equally as dumb but oh well.

No thief and no cookies.

I texted Alex at school to find out where he moved them…..yes, during class.

Waited, waited, waited, and finally heard back.

“I came home and got them when I was driving in driver’s ed. I didn’t get to tell you yet.”

Just another day in my life.

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PS. And after all that, he forgot to turn in the written part of the assignment which means he gets no credit.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

My Pants and Me

I don’t think my pants like me.

If they do, they sure do show it in a funny way.

My pants have begun whining. Evidently, they are tired of being stretched to the max. They are tired of being pulled, prodded, and pulled again.

Well, excuse me. So sorry to have offended you.

Perhaps if you’d loosen up a bit, we wouldn’t have these little struggles.

After all, I clean you, iron you, and hang you up. It’s not like I dump you in the middle of the floor like some other people I know.

And this is how you repay me? By fussing and complaining?

All because I perhaps indulged in a few too many cookies, a Big Mac or two, full strength coke, pizza, and other such lovely, addicting items.....and I'm over 40....gasp!

Hmmm…

Well, let me offer these words of advice to you, my lovely pants.

I would suggest you change your attitude or you may find yourself jobless.

And in this economy, that would not be a wise choice.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Ain't Technology Grand?

I’m not talking about laptops, i-phones, i-pads, and other accessories that we seem to own.

I’m not even talking about high def tv, satellite service, or fancy cell phones.

Nope.

I am talking about bathrooms.

Yep, bathrooms.

When we were in China, we stayed in some hotels that were four to five star status. In the bathroom, in addition to the bidet (try explaining that to your kids), there was always a television and a phone.

So you can sit there doing your business and not miss one minute of your favorite show as well as call your mom at the same time.

Talk about multi-tasking.

Well, the hotel where Dave was recently staying had something else unusual in the bathroom.

Fighter pilot potties.

Well, not really but…

Potties that do all kinds of things.

You could wash and dry your bottom and other essential pieces, warm or cool the toilet seat, and neutralize odors. It even had an energy saver mode….guess you’d just better be sure to wake it up in time.





Now, just add a fridge and you’d be all set.

Phone, tv, wireless for the laptop, high tech potty, and food.

You’d never have to leave the bathroom.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Falling Down on the Job

What happens when you mix a certain uncoordinated five year old with a scooter?

You get this….



It didn’t look this bad when she first fell, I swear.

I did have to giggle at the comment from Anne, the owner of the girls daycare....

“You know what, Abby? Every time your parents have custody of you over a break, you come back a mess.”

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But oh so very true.

Sigh.

Monday, April 12, 2010

The Endless Journey

Imagine the longest plane trip you ever took.

Was it two hours, four hours, or more?

For me, it would be to China.

Sixteen hours from New York to Hong Kong.

I hate to fly. With a passion.

What helps me when flying?

No, not that, silly.

The onboard entertainment. Movies, games, television, and the map of where you are so you can see how many hours of sheer torture you have left.

The entertainment was the only way my kids made it to and from China alive. I promise.

Well, today, Dave left for Seoul….a mere stepping stone to Hong Kong. And a slightly shorter trip of only 13 hours.

Like that makes a huge difference. (snort)

Shortly after he boarded, I got an email saying the flight crew had just announced that the onboard entertainment would not be available due to mechanical issues.

Say what?

Can you imagine?

If I was a mom on that flight and traveling with my kids, I would have hung my head in my hands and cried.

And then begged for something to ease my pain.

I hope everyone on board arrives safe and sound in Seoul.

Especially the moms.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

How We Spent Spring Break

We…..

….walked 12 miles or more



….climbed 11 stories (or so it seemed)



….learned to make 10 cookies (well, 10,000)



….watched a certain boy text 9 (or 900) times



….had 8 people in a 2 bedroom suite
(no picture so use your imagination)

….heard Katie ask for a camera at least 7 times



….spent 6 hours exploring



….squeezed 5 on the couch



….loved 4 doing piggy back rides



…..ordered 3 pizzas for dinner



….saw 2 snuggle



…..had 1 party way too late



….loved our visit to Charleston with cousins…..

Monday, April 5, 2010

Abby vs. The Creek

Ah, the first day of spring break. How shall we spend it?

Mom chose a book and the couch.

Dad chose to expand the patio.

Alex chose to take the little girls on an adventure.

Uh oh.

Considering the last adventure involved fire, I was a tad concerned.

But Alex, his girlfriend Julie, Anna Grace, and Abby all happily headed off for the nature trail in our neighborhood. Evidently the girls were bound and determined to catch a fish….by using sticks.

Whatever.

As I am enjoying my solitude and book, the phone rang. It was Alex.

I expected to hear…..the girls are tired and don’t want to walk home. Can you come get us?

But this is what I heard: Mom? Abby fell in the creek. She’s walking kind of funny since she’s so wet so we’re coming home.

Oh good grief.

What happened?

Evidently, she decided to use a stick as a bridge to cross the creek.

And Alex just stood there watching. Didn’t offer a word of warning or anything.

His response to my incredulous look….

Well, she won’t do it again, will she?

Sunday, April 4, 2010

The Easter Blues.....

The question of the week from Anna Grace: Who is the Easter Bunny?

I thought perhaps we were headed toward “the talk” but then she came up with her own answer.

The Easter Bunny is Santa Claus.

Guess he’s hard up for a job.

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Easter morning dawned bright and early. But only one little girl appeared. Anna Grace really struggled to not go searching for eggs without her sister. She sure did scope them out though….biding her time.

And Abby appeared. Miserable, not talking, and not happy.

Uh oh.

Let the egg hunt begin.

Anna Grace took off like a shot. Abby slowly looked around, found a few, and gave up.

Mommy and Anna Grace finished up the hunt.

Within minutes we learned the reason why Abs did not want to search for eggs.

Tummy virus. Poor baby.

We plopped her on the couch and regrouped. No church for her.



Anna Grace donned her new dress though and was ready to hit the road.



Katie was home with us too…



And a rare photo of mom…



Alex was given the choice to go to church or stay home with his sister who may throw up on him.

He chose to stay home.

Go figure.

But he had strict instructions to not play with fire while we were gone.